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- Joke of the Day
Mon 24-Aug-15
7:03 pm
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brightspark
Wilts

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big_laugh  big_laugh   big_laugh

Women are like tea bags. . .
you never know how strong they are
until they're in hot water.
- Eleanor Roosevelt -
Mon 24-Aug-15
8:30 pm
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Toffeeapple
North Bucks

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Ah, yes.  It didn't work for my knitting though...

I'll try that again!

Tue 25-Aug-15
6:09 pm
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brightspark
Wilts

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Just read this on Facebook:

"I wish I were a glow worm

A glow worm's never glum

'Cause how can you be grumpy

when the sun shines out your bum?"

whistle

Women are like tea bags. . .
you never know how strong they are
until they're in hot water.
- Eleanor Roosevelt -
Tue 25-Aug-15
6:50 pm
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Sooliz
Somerset

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big_laugh

Erm Val, I though you didn't do Facebook?  whistle eeek

learning to love veg…..except celery :-O

Tue 25-Aug-15
9:26 pm
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Toffeeapple
North Bucks

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What Sue said!

I'll try that again!

Wed 26-Aug-15
9:02 am
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brightspark
Wilts

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I don't, but OH does, and for some reason put it on my phone.(!)

I can read others, of course, but I don't subscribe!

Women are like tea bags. . .
you never know how strong they are
until they're in hot water.
- Eleanor Roosevelt -
Sat 5-Sep-15
11:50 am
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bobbyW
East Suffolk almost near the sea and the Castle on the Hill.

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I just burned 3000 calories

 

I forgot to take the pizza out of the ovenrunaway

"NEVER RIDE FASTER THAN YOUR GUARDIAN ANGEL CAN FLY"
Your future self is watching you right now through memories

Sat 5-Sep-15
2:52 pm
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Toffeeapple
North Bucks

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Boom boom!

I'll try that again!

Sun 6-Sep-15
11:59 am
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bobbyW
East Suffolk almost near the sea and the Castle on the Hill.

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Grandmother always told me to Remember that old folk are worth a fortune, they have Silver in their hair, Stones in their kidneys, Lead in their feet and Gas in their stomachs.

She had become quite a frivolous old girl, having two gentlemen with her all the time: “Will Power” helped her to get out of bed, and “Arthur Ritis” never left her alone.

The vicar came to call one day, he said at her age she should be thinking of the hereafter. She told him "I do that all the time. No matter where I am, in the living room, the study, the kitchen, or upstairs, I always ask myself - “ what am I hereafter”

"NEVER RIDE FASTER THAN YOUR GUARDIAN ANGEL CAN FLY"
Your future self is watching you right now through memories

Fri 18-Sep-15
10:20 am
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bobbyW
East Suffolk almost near the sea and the Castle on the Hill.

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A young man received a parrot as a gift. The parrot had a bad attitude and an even worse

vocabulary. Every word out of the bird's mouth was rude, obnoxious and laced with profanity.

 

He tried and tried to change the bird's attitude by consistently saying only polite words, playing soft music and anything else he could think of to ' clean up' the bird's vocabulary.

 

Finally, the man was fed up and he yelled at the parrot. The parrot yelled back. He shook the

parrot and the parrot got angrier and even ruder. In desperation, he threw up his hand,

grabbed the bird and put him in the freezer.

 

For a few minutes the parrot squawked and kicked and screamed.

 

Then suddenly there was total quiet. Not a peep was heard for over a minute.

 

Fearing that he'd hurt the parrot, the man quickly opened the door to the freezer.

 

The parrot calmly stepped out onto the man's outstretched arms and said, 'I believe I may have

offended you with my rude language and actions. I'm sincerely remorseful for my inappropriate transgressions and I fully intend to do everything I can to correct my rude and unforgivable behaviour'

 

The man was stunned at the change in the bird's attitude. As he was about to ask the parrot

what had made such a dramatic change in his behaviour, the bird continued,

 

' May I ask what the turkey did? '

"NEVER RIDE FASTER THAN YOUR GUARDIAN ANGEL CAN FLY"
Your future self is watching you right now through memories

Fri 18-Sep-15
12:09 pm
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Ambersparkle

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Very funny  Bob. laugh

Fri 18-Sep-15
4:42 pm
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brightspark
Wilts

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laugh good one, Bob. ok

Women are like tea bags. . .
you never know how strong they are
until they're in hot water.
- Eleanor Roosevelt -
Tue 10-Nov-15
2:34 pm
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bobbyW
East Suffolk almost near the sea and the Castle on the Hill.

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Image Enlarger

"NEVER RIDE FASTER THAN YOUR GUARDIAN ANGEL CAN FLY"
Your future self is watching you right now through memories

Tue 10-Nov-15
4:41 pm
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Toffeeapple
North Bucks

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Then I want to be in the same nursing home!

I'll try that again!

Tue 10-Nov-15
5:38 pm
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danast
Argyll, Scotland

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wave  Me too!!  We could create some marvellous havoc!!     big_laugh  big_laugh  

Old teachers never die, they just lose their class

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