Yesterday I escaped from a prison sentence (almost)
Jalopy always travels at a sedate pace but when I slide into the leather seats of Danny’s company car, it is a far smoother ride. Purring home at 40mph through Cambridge City in D’s car feels like 30mph in Jalopy. This is unfortunate. Cambridge City speeding cameras perk up when I glide by. This city has been my Waterloo on two occasions. The maddening thing is that I’m normally very careful in built up areas and I get really angry when cars speed through our village. They might kill a cat, stray dog or even a child. But I seem to...
read moreFreddie – a dog with personality
I knew on the recce visit that Freddie could be a good companion. His beautiful deep brown eyes sized me up carefully. “Do you think that Freddie will be a problem?” “Of course not. He’s lovely.” Somewhere deep down inside I reckoned that there might be glitches. I could tell from his glance that he agreed. Generally when I’m decorating houses I have learnt to be firm and cool with the resident dogs. Otherwise I’m suddenly having to deal with paint tinged disasters. Like the time that Buster, the Norfolk Terrier, took a short cut...
read moreASBO fridge freezer
Danny has secretly slapped an Anti Social Behaviour Order on our fridge freezer. Last weekend we had a bit of a fright with the vociferous beast. It was suddenly struck quite dumb. “I think that the fridge is very sick, Danny. The light goes on when I open the door but the motor does not hum.” This fridge has been an adolescent for as far back as we can remember. Moody and prone to dramatic outbursts of weeping into the space that used to hold the crisper drawers. Over the past couple of years it has been insisting that it’s a freezer...
read moreKeep fit with flies
Danny doesn’t kill things. Ants, wasps, caterpillars and slugs are all given a free range in our cottage and garden. When his car pulls out of the drive I attack the pests that are destroying our stuff. The ants and wasps initially and then it’s a leisurely stroll down to the kitchen garden with a bottle of beer. To top up the complimentary bar in the slug traps. There is one creature that D hates and encourages me to destroy. Sociable and busy creatures they move swiftly from manure to the kitchen sides and never, ever wash their...
read moreStick blender
Back in the eighties I was given a blender. A large device that stood on a stand with an orange plastic cap over the hole in its lid. And, to keep it company, a nifty compact electric whisk with two metal prongs for whisking stuff. “These are essential in any kitchen.” I was assured. Both rarely left the darkness of the cupboard to perform as I didn’t really cook. But I liked having them just in case I caught the cooking bug. Many years later Danny reconstituted some semi solidified paint using the electric whisk with a slow...
read moreFroth
I used launderettes for years. Started at university. And it was a bit of a learning curve, particularly assessing how much powder to use. The machines seemed enormous the clothes were dirty. What was the yardstick? Sometimes an innocent would add a whole pack of powder to a wash. The machine would bubble and froth and eventually the foam would escape in a trail that moved across the floor with the slickness of a skier in a supermarket. The lady would bob out from her cubby hole. With a sponge lashed to the end of a stick and corral the...
read moreGuinea pigs are heaven to eat
Warning ! This post is not suitable reading for the faint hearted, it contains black humour. Guinea pigs are a delicacy in Peru. I discovered that they are delicious raw. One day I returned from my first wallpapering job to find The Contessa barking with delight from a pretty yellow silk button backed chair. Peeping out from a pile of cushions beside her was a tan shorthaired guinea pig with very bright black eyes. Not knowing quite how to deal with the situation I reached for the kitchen roll. My sister, who was with me at the time,...
read moreTagged by Sally
I was tagged for a meme yesterday by Sally who writes the Casalba News blog. This is a great new blog, beautifully written and like the five blogs that I’ve tagged at the end of this post well worth a visit. I am publishing a photo of my last mouthful of our breakfast this morning. Sally is married to an Italian and living in Italy. She might sometimes miss the naughty breakfasts that the British like to indulge in every now and then. Yes, it is fried bread crisped in the fat of home cured bacon… Heaven. What I was doing 10 years...
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